Silver Bullets
by TheOwlAndThePlatypus
Summary: Anyone want to see the Cullens killed by a 12 year old in a matter of minutes? Written randomly out of boredom. Buffy only gets a minor part.


**Silver Bullets**

"Bye Dad!" Sophie called, walking out the door with her shiny, new, massive camping backpack. The backpack was almost as big as her, despite its being one of the smallest in the shop. She was, after all, only twelve. She hiked into the woods until she found the meadow where she always went to be alone. But what her father didn't know was that she was not here just on a camping trip. She was a trained vampire slayer, the youngest graduate from Forks Vampire Slayers Academy (FVSA for short), and the shapeshifters who ran it had reported strange sightings of mysterious glittering on sunny days – a clear sign of vampire activity in the area. She felt a little nervous – this was her first assignment – but she shrugged it off and pitched her tent.

Having removed her stuff from her bag and set up her tent to look like a home, she put her gun, complete with silver bullets that contained miniature crucifixes in her belt, and set off to scout around. By the time evening fell, she had found nothing, and returned to her tent, tired and frustrated. She ate a sandwich and went to bed.

The next morning, she left her tent to find two very curious vampires – one girl and one boy. Hastily hiding her gun at the back of her belt, she waved a cheerful hello. The boy raised one eyebrow, but said nothing. The girl, however, was much more friendly.

"Ignore Edward - he's always like this," she said, and whispered confidentially, "He has a mental…thingy…"

"Problem?" asked Sophie.

"Well, you could call it that," said the girl, "We prefer to think of it as an endearing feature,"

"Oh," said Sophie, worried that they had taken offence, "sorry…"

"Don't worry," interrupted the girl, "My name's Alice by the way." The boy spoke for the first time,

"You know, the real reason she's so pleased to meet you is that you're smaller than her. She never thought this day would come,"

"Oh shut up," complained Alice, slapping him lightly. Reflexively, he darted back out of the way at an unnatural speed. Sophie did her best to put a shocked look on her face, and Edward swore under his breath. Then, his eyes widened slightly.

"Now's a bad time," he told Sophie, "a really bad time. There are more of us, and we have visitors. Can't believe they sent a _kid_," he muttered, more to himself than anyone else. Ah. They knew. This could put a spanner in the works. Unless…

"Oh no you don't," the gun was out of Sophie's hands before she could take aim and her hands were behind her back. Damn vampires, Sophie fumed. Damn talents. Then Alice was talking in her ear.

"This is really stupid of me, but I'm going to let you go. Get out of here as fast as you can – one of our guests will know almost immediately that we met you and if they find you, they will kill you. We'll stay away to give you time," She looked at the gun. "And you might as well take this – it won't help us to have evidence lying around," She threw it hard into the forest, "Go fetch, I don't want you killing us. Now, scram," saying this, she let go of Sophie's arm and shoved her away, "We'll take care of the tent," Sophie ran. She would tell the shapeshifters about her discovery.

Charlotte was wandering in the woods, her gun close to hand. Sophie, one of her team mates, had run into two vampires just last week, and they had told her there were more, not to mention the fact that one of them could read minds and the other appeared to have an ability to see the future. But she was safe – she was sure they wouldn't attack if they knew, as they would, that the gun was just for defence.

Suddenly, she heard a noise behind her. Panicking, she fled through the woods. She didn't know where she was going, just that she wanted to get away. She knew she was a coward, but usually Sophie's bravery made up for that – they were almost always together – they were best friends, after all. But now she was alone. _Don't think,_ she told herself, _just run. _Eventually, she stopped, and realised that the noise had been nothing – probably just a squirrel. And now she was lost. Great. She wandered on, trying to get her bearings. Suddenly, she stumbled across a clearing in which a house stood. Taking a deep breath, she rang the doorbell. As soon as the door opened, she blurted out,

"Where am I?" Then she looked up. Into a pale face, with bright gold eyes. She backed away, nervously.

"What's wrong? Would you like to come in?" The man asked. He looked friendly enough, and she had her defence in case, so she nodded nervously. She had been running longer than she had thought, and her legs would not hold her much longer.

"What's going on?" she heard a voice call from inside the house.

"It's just a girl," The man called back.

"Girl?" The voice asked hopefully, and was rewarded with a smack, "Aw, c'mon Rose, just kidding…"

"You'd better be," Another voice replied.

"Don't mind my family," said the man, "I'm Carlisle, their adoptive father," he smiled. He certainly seemed friendly. Carlisle led Charlotte into a room with sofas and a massive glass window. Most of his family smiled and said hello, but one of the boys stared at her through narrow eyes.

"Carlisle!" he exclaimed, clearly annoyed, "I told you not to let anyone in – she's another like the one we met last week," All eyes were instantly on Charlotte. Feeling threatened, she pulled out her gun.

"Nobody move," she growled. They stood there, puzzled for a minute. Then the boy muttered something to Carlisle, who nodded.

"Put the gun down, Charlotte," Carlisle said, gently, "Guns can't hurt us, but they can hurt you…"

"_This_ gun can hurt you," said Charlotte, uncertainly, "It's got silver bullets that contain crucifixes and are dipped in garlic…" She stopped. Everyone was laughing. _Fine then._ She thought, taking aim, and firing a bullet straight into Edward's heart. Edward let out a yell of pain.

"She was right," he moaned, "That gun is lethal," The other Cullens stood, dumbfounded, as Edward stumbled around clutching his heart and screaming in agony, before he finally died. Just then, a crowd of rabid fan girls came running in, horrified, trampling Alice to death, and disappearing into the woods, carrying Edward's body with them. Jaspar stepped forward, planning to kill Charlotte in revenge, but then had a better idea, and unleashed his pain on everyone present. Unfortunately, he proceeded to die as he felt his own feelings magnified by five other people. Charlotte, eager to claim more lives, quickly shot down Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie, but when she tried to shoot Emmet, the bullet just bounced off his thick skull, and suddenly there was a very angry, very strong vampire just inches from Charlotte's face.

Suddenly, a wooden stake burst out through his chest, showering Charlotte in a cascade of blood. Emmet fell to the floor, dead, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer stepped out from behind him, smiling. She proceeded to disappear in a puff of smoke, and Charlotte found her way home along the road that connected the house to the outside world.

"That's _so_ unfair," Sophie whined, "They were _my _assignment,"

"Never mind," Charlotte comforted her, "There'll be more," They turned round to find Jacob standing millimetres behind them, and Charlotte nearly fell off the wall in shock.

"New assignment," he said, grinning, "Charlotte, go clear up that house – it's your mess,"

"Do I have to?" Charlotte moaned.

"Yes. Now go,".


End file.
